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13. Are you actively related to some organization or group interested in making the world a better place?
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Articles In This Section:· 1. How well do you understand the fictions and facts about love? - part 1 · 1. How well do you understand the fictions and facts about love? - part 2 · 1. How well do you understand the fictions and facts about love? - part 3 · 3. Does the other remind you strongly of some dear relative or friend whom you once loved? · 8. How much have you been swayed by "minor point" attractions? · 11. How similar are your ideals, values, and goals in life? - part 1 · 11. How similar are your ideals, values, and goals in life? - part 2 · 12. Do you have common interests in actively promoting "worthy causes?"
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Here the word "active" is important. Merely having a nominal membership or making a small donation is not enough. For despite the disunity which may result from differences regarding the support of "worthy causes," the concern which these represent is of great importance to the success of the family itself.
To begin with, activity in a common cause which they earnestly share can be a powerful bond uniting the couple more closely. We know that men in the same combat unit, such as a bomber crew, quickly develop amazingly strong feelings of attachment for each other. Few things weld people together as strongly and as closely as fighting side by side against a common foe for a common goal. In the second place, social concern is an indication that you can rise above the small, selfish interests which threaten a marriage. The man who is vitally interested in a better city government is not likely to spend too much time being suspiciously jealous of his wife. The woman who is fighting for better schools will be less likely to feel resentful toward her husband because he does not bring her presents all the time. Those who are willing to make real sacrifices for ideal ends are certainly interested in something beyond themselves. And such a concern for others is among the most important character essentials for success in marriage. Finally, an active social concern is essential to the job of being a good homemaker. It sounds very well to say, "My job is not to go running around to all kinds of meetings. The best way I can contribute to a better world is to stay home and do a good job with my own family." But what is "doing a good job?" Is it spending all one's time in washing walls and cooking fancy dishes? Your family does not exist in a social vacuum. It is part of a community, of a social and economic system. Unless this larger setting is healthy, you may not be able to "do a good job." The lady who resented a donation to the Better Government Association felt quite differently about it when her own daughter was robbed—a crime which greater police efficiency could have prevented. Those who stay home and pay no attention to economic reform may feel quite differently about it when a depression comes which puts the husband out of a job. We live in what is, in some respects, an evil and a dangerous world. We cannot put out a fire or prevent world conflagration by staying home and minding our own business. The gangs in the neighborhood, the condition of the government and the schools—these are the business of parents, far more than running a vacuum cleaner and frying chicken. Nor is it enough merely to check evils. We must also participate in the intelligent planning and creative building of the future. People are rightly committed to great social and religious purposes, and to the programs and institutions which bring these to pass. The couple which works together for a better community is not driving a wedge of separation between themselves. They are forging a powerful bond of unity. Parents in the thick of the fight are doing more than helping protect their children. They can also make them strong. For safety in our kind of world is best achieved not through shelter, but through active understanding. One of the best services which parents can render their children is to open the windows of their homes and let the world, with its evil and its good, flow through.
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